Back to working out, I gained a couple pounds on my week off because I didn’t feel like adjusting 800 calories out of my diet ~chuckles~, plus it was beneficial to gain a little for the oncoming onslaught of weightlifting which I started this morning at 5am.

I went to the doctor yesterday and all my tests came back great!  He also noticed I lost another 11 pounds since I saw him last ~smiles~.  He is leaving his practice though to move back to Washington D.C.  He has been my doctor for like 15 years, now I have to find a new one ~chuckles~.  I am just glad that I am getting better.

I can’t remember the last time I had a cold or flu.  It’s been over a year, and I have only had 2 infections this year!!!  Not even MRSA and IDS can kick my ASS!!!  I am the ETERNAL CHAMPION!!!  A legend in my own mind! ~grins~.

I have a house inspection tomorrow, so I am busting my ass cleaning the house.  I don’t really mind cleaning except for the oven because I only do it every 3-6 months, so it gets pretty nasty, especially with my wife who doesn’t have to clean can spill whatever the hell she want in it ~sighs & chuckles~

I just got done mopping the floors, so I am waiting for them to dry so I can go out for my hour walk!  I got some Stablicers for the ice and snow, so I am ready for the Mother Nature to hit me full on so I can kick her butt too!!!

I woke up last night to Julie crying and Mariah crying that her mom hated her! ~sighs~  I get so little sleep why not wake up for a drama emergency?!  I guess Mariah said she didn’t like Julie and wanted a new mom ~sighs~.  Julie was trying to reconcile it this morning and I told her that is just the meanness of kids.  My brother and I use to call my mom a “meanie” because we knew it affected her, but we would always feel bad once we made her cry ~frowns~.  All kids have to learn their boundaries and sometimes it hurts the child and the adult ~chuckles~.

I went to the dentist and he was awe inspired by my teeth, I am 43 and not a single cavity!!!  However, he said my gums are shot and you can see roots on some of my molars, but I just ignore the pain since I live with it so much…what would make other people want to blow their head off is just a major annoyance for me ~chuckles~.  I have to go to a peritonitis and I think they will want to graph some tissue on my gums or give me some molar implants, but I am hoping a good cleaning will do the trick!!! ~smiles~

We got to puppy sit “Floppers”.  He is this cute little Cocker Spaniel puppy!!!  And when I say cute, I mean uber cute!  We all enjoyed his visit with us and had a blast playing with him.  He likes me the most I guess and would always come lay by me…dogs love me! ~smiles~  Cats fear me! ~grins~

All right, the floors have to be dry by now…I gotta go walk 4 miles ~smiles~

I am on my break from working out.  I always know when I am overtraining in weightlifting because I start getting weaker ~chuckles~, and I know when I am done too much in cardio because I start getting irritable, ache, and cold like symptoms ~smiles~.

This happens about 4-6 weeks, then I take a full week off to let my body rest up and then I am stronger than I was before! ~smiles~

I like my week off, but I always feel guilty like I’m being lazy or slacking because I have such a drive to finish what I start ~chuckles~.  And with very little patience and lots of obsessive nature it makes it that much harder, especially because I put on a pound or two during that week off ~chuckles~

It is freezing outside and my poor little fingers have been turning blue ~chuckles~, so I got some gloves they were marked down from $50 to $12..boy was my wife happy about that ~chuckles~.  They even have a little spout and cover so you can blow into the gloves without taking them off! ~smiles~.

I start back up tomorrow, so I don’t have that long too wait ~smiles~

I started incorporating “Stretching” into my 3 hour daily workout ~chuckles~.  The first day I crunched my bad disc in my lower back and screamed so loud I thought the police would show up ~chuckles~, but it doesn’t stop me from lifting my weights or jogging ~chuckles~, but it is making my joints feel a lot better ~smiles~

Julie is in Indianapolis for the week training for her new job.  She just got a 6k raise for a year, so now she is making $44K a year which kind of sucks because we would have qualified for food stamps and free lunches for Mariah, now we are $2k over that and still poor as hell and struggling ~chuckles~ with no help in sight ~sighs~.

The women of the area apparently know Julie is gone because they keep coming over ~chuckles~.  Some of them are quite hot too, but I would never do anything stupid like have sex with them, and not because I don’t want too, but I know I would feel so guilty, and I just don’t like feeling guilty, so by not committing a stupid action I won’t have to feel that guilt ~smiles~, problem solved! ~chuckles~  But I do like being surrounded by beautiful women, and I am quite the flirt ~grins~.  I don’t mind them coming over though because I get empty nest syndrome with everyone at school and in work.

One of Julie’s good friends are coming over after work tonight to play with Mariah, I guess so she can have some girl time…she already misses her mom ~chuckles~.  She is going to teach her some cheers for cheerleading ~smiles~.  And I have Theresa and her son Michael coming over for Tacos tonight, so I will see if Christina wants to eat dinner with us too!  Maybe I’ll even get a big bottle of booze! ~chuckles~

I put my name out everywhere for more volunteer work, but I guess no one wants me ~sighs~.  I have lots of skills ~chuckles~, I know I can help someone out there! ~smiles~

Mariah’s school started a computer lab and I put down there I would help…I owned a computer business as many of you know, and I am a Microsoft Office Master Specialist, and they are teaching it there to low income folks, but I guess they don’t need me ~sighs~, so I will continue to help the children in the neighborhood and clean up the garbage from litterbugs and walk the handicapped neighbor’s dog ~smiles~

Julie has been reading Norse/Viking literature lately?!  I think she is either trying to understand my ways, and me or just trying to show she loves me and by proxy learning about my ancestry and my spiritual views ~smiles~.

We had an argument a week or so ago, not a bad one, but enough to make her think about some things I said ~smiles~.  And she knew it was the truth, so I think she is just trying to understand.

As many of you know I was very sick terminally and chronically, I am still sick but no one can tell and my diseases have been causing less and less problems for me in the last year, greatly less! ~smiles~  Not bad for someone who was suppose to be dead over 2 years ago! ~smiles~

What most people don’t know and what I explained to my wife which she realized was true is:

When I gave up my spirituality and what I knew to be true, to make my wife and her parents happy by becoming a Christian is when I started getting sick, the longer I tried to be a Christian the sicker I got! ~sighs~  But I really wanted to be one, so my wife and her family would be happy and proud of me, but last year I revolted and basically said screw them all, I can’t take it anymore, so I went back to my spirituality, and since that time I have grown stronger, healthier, and have not been quite as insane, I know the insane part isn’t saying much ~chuckles~.

My wife and her family do not understand my miraculous recovery from worshipping heathen Gods ~chuckles~ (anything other than Christ).  I see it as an affirmation that I am in the right faith so I proposed this question to her and her parents?

Why would God miraculously heal a heathen?  Why do Native Americans, Muslims, Buddhist, etc. all receive miraculous healings?  Why would God heal those that don’t obey him?  We know the Devil/Dark Forces wouldn’t do that because apparently they get your soul if you don’t worship Christ ~chuckles~, so it would be in their best interest to let time take over ~smiles~.  Why does God give his own worshippers cancer and debilitating illnesses? ~smiles~  And why would a heathen be healed while people in her church are dying like I was?

The bottom line is we learn our religion/spirituality in our upbringing via geography, socialism, rearing, and personal experiences!  If you were born in Middle East you would be a Muslim and would know that Allah is the only God, if you were born in China you would know that Buddha was the prophet/mystic of the one truth!  If you are raised in the ghetto and told that white people hate you for being black and that pussy, guns and drugs is what really matters, then that is what you believe! ~smiles~

I now firmly believe that forced conversion is the worst thing you can do to anybody!  If someone wants to convert like I did that is one thing, and even that didn’t work for me ~smiles~, but it has for millions, so conversion itself isn’t necessarily bad, but invoked conversion is devastating and destroys the soul and kills any kind of trust! ~smiles~  I am pretty sure Christ wanted his religion to be one of “Attraction” and not “promotion” ~smiles~.

I love and like many Christians out there and I never say your wrong or your religion is wrong, so why do I always have to hear it? ~chuckles~  It just makes me sad, hurt and angry that I cannot just be loved for who I am and what I know to be true.  I mean if I was out killing kids or animals for sacrifice or purposely hurting people I could see someone wanting to convert me to something nicer, but I am not like that ~smiles~.

Besides without us warriors who will protect all your Christians in this world? ~smiles~  I know if anyone tries to hurt the people I love regardless of religion they will have me to deal with ~smiles~, both in the spiritual realm where I work my magic and in this one where I am a great physical presence ~smiles~.

I still haven’t found a puppy because like Gail mentioned they are expensive ~chuckles~, and I want a huge dog like a Rottweiler or a Mastiff.  I can keep up on the food, shots, etc.  I just don’t have the initial $400 to buy one, so I guess when God wants me to have one it will show up free ~chuckles~, until then I will just deal with the depression and lonesomeness ~smiles~

I have been out of pot for 5 days ~cringes~, luckily people who know and understand my PTSD and IERD have come by everyday to ensure that I am mellow ~smiles~.  Julie will be getting paid every two weeks here soon, since Liberty Mutual bought out SAFECO, that will be nice then there will be no lapses between my medications ~smiles~

I had to do my quarterly blood testing yesterday, I hope they can’t find anything wrong with my kidneys now, then I’ll write a book about the mind and how to destroy disease!  I’ll get you guys to help me make it a best seller ~chuckles~.

OK, I’m sure all your eyeballs are getting tired by now…best wishes and love to all! ~smiles~

I would like to talk about “Patriotism” and I’m not talking about the pseudo-patriotism spawned by elected officials and media news conglomerates! ~sighs~

You can look up the word patriotism but it basically means devotion to the welfare of one’s country!

Our forefathers said there would be a day when we would need to destroy or take over our government to keep the integrity of our republic in order…that day has come and gone! ~smiles~.

I would like to talk now about the word “Coward”.  Coward is the exact opposite of courage and patriotism.  It is the inability to act with courage in the face of real threat! Like most lazy uneducated Americans who fear for their lives but are unwilling to sacrifice in order to bring a new dawn to our country!

AIG just got 85+ billion dollars and in their first week spent 75 billion of it and are now asking for 32 billion more while throwing half a million dollar parties for executives in hotels most of us will never afford to stay in!

The vast majority was and is against the 1 trillion dollar bailout, which thus far has done nothing, nor will it!  You and your children will have to pay for it and any money they will make on it you won’t see despite rhetoric talks.

Now people are angry, but what are they doing?  Being cowards and using their useless pens against an enemy that knows fully our suppression and cowardice to truly act in a patriotic fashion by overthrowing the government and establishing a new government with people who actually give a shit about our country!!! ~growls~

Talk is for cowards!  Action is for the patriotic!

It is for this reason I now declare war upon the government of my country and all those who side with the government, and all those who are too cowardly to rally the troops and fight for their very existence.

Enjoy the fact that medical bills will kill your 401k’s and destroy your American dreams…Enjoy the fact that you can’t put your kids through college while fat executives are safe under the umbrellas of our prestigious government!!!

They know you are cowards and will do nothing, so they will continue to fuck you in the ass until you are so stupid  you are incapable of lifting your arm up to fight!

Government officials and the rich beware, I will find you and I will make you lives like those you look down on!

The war is on!

The “Secret Order of Universal Law” has been set in place…you will reap what you have sewn!

I’m down to 307 and hopefully 306 tomorrow when I weigh in ~cheers~.

I bought some Stablicers for my new cross-trainers.  They are the best-studded soles you strap on your shoes.  They have little tiny studs in them that are replaceable, so I bought a 50 pack of studs too!  I look forward to old man winter getting his ass kicked by yours truly! ~grins~

I am worn down on the weightlifting, so it must be time to take a few extra days off ~smiles~.  I usually do hardcore bodybuilding 6 days a week, well after about 4-6 weeks I actually start getting weaker because of the continuous teardown of muscle, but a few extra days and Viola I am superman strong again! ~chuckles~

It was suggested because of my depression and loneliness of being at home that I should get a dog.  I can’t afford to buy a dog, but I found a freepuppylistings.com, but there isn’t any in driving range. I did find a nice AKC, registered Rottweiler puppy, but it’s in Utah and I don’t think I have the $200 for shipping and stuff ~sighs~.  I guess when God wants me to get a dog he’ll give me one ~snickers~.  I did put a post in Craigslist incases someone has a puppy they want to get rid of ~smiles~.

I have been practicing my sword work in marital arts…not bad for a couple months…I broke out my staff yesterday.  It took a couple minutes but it didn’t take long to fling it around kempo style ~grins~.

I bought a full body stretch for beginners from TAMILEE.  My arthritis and fibro has been kicking my ass, but I think with some good stretching I might be able to relieve that shrinking inflexible feeling ~smiles~.

I get so lonesome around this house, then everyone comes home and leaves me to go do church stuff ~sighs~.  I keep telling my wife, but God is more important than I, so I will just keep doing what I am doing until I finally snap ~chuckles~.  No one listens too me then they get all freaked out when I blow ~sighs~.  Perhaps if they could hear my voice instead of their own they might hear what I am trying to say! ~grins~.

I put my name out there for all sorts of volunteer work, but I guess people don’t really need volunteers?

Our 401k has lost 30%, so it’s a good thing we still have decades before we retire, too bad the world won’t be like we know it in 3.5 years, and from what I can see recently it is already starting its demise ~smiles~  The market is under 9K in trading already! ~chuckles~

Well I hope you are all doing good, if your rich and I kill you sorry…you shouldn’t be driving nice cars while the rest of us are struggling, and maybe if you lucky you won’t go to hell when God is done with you ~grins~.

To all the rest of you God’s Speed!